I feel...validated?? :) :/ :(

My camera is MIA again so in the mean time I wanted to ask all you Wise Women what you think about validating your childrens' feelings. I was recently at a conference and there was a focus on this topic and I never really thought about it but now I'm intrigued.
I grew up in a home where I was told if someone offended me, GET OVER IT. If I'm just having a bad day, GET OVER IT. If my sister made me mad and called me a fat piece of crap, GET OVER IT. Basically I wasn't allowed to have a bad day and if I did I was supposed to keep it to myself and fake everyone out that it was the best day ever!!
Do I feel like this made me a recluse, confused, unable to own my feelings and control them?
Quite the opposite.
I am actually very grateful that my parents took this approach with me. I feel like I don't waste a lot of time trying to decide if so or so meant offense and how I am going to deal with that. I just GET OVER IT. There's a lot more time to be happy when you aren't worrying about being worried.
And lets be honest, who enjoys being with someone who is constantly down or saying negative things about themselves or others and how someone offended them (again!!)? I sure don't. It makes me want to say just GET OVER IT!! So what if that person said/did/meant that?? Are you really going to let it ruin your day when chances are they didn't even mean it that way? I guess some people just need the drama...
So you can imagine my surprise when I was told that I need to sit my child down every time he throws a tantrum or says he's mad about something or at someone or someone hurt his feelings and talk out his feelings with him. Doesn't the regular practice of exploring one's feelings make one an emotional hypochondriac?? Isn't it so much easier and, well, happier, just being happy? I get that its not easy just getting over every negative thing in your life, and sometime its not even possible without professional help, but in the little day to day crisis' isn't it just better to try to GET OVER IT?
Unfortunately, the just GET OVER IT method isn't working so hot with my almost-3-year-old. So I'm thinking maybe the feelings validating method might be the answer.

Here are some pros of validating I see:

1. it helps children and parents understand the real emotion and issue.
2. the child is more honest and open.
3. they take responsibility for their emotions so they can fix it.

I feel I have already discussed the cons. Which brings me to one more point. Although I think the GET OVER IT method worked great for me as a child and I still apply it to myself when I'm feeling particularly irked or offended about something (gretchen, your over-reacting. Just GET OVER IT and salvage the rest of your day) but I need my husband to validate my feelings. When he has said or done something to hurt me I expect him to own up to it and apologize. I think marriage would be the worse if spouses didn't validate each other's feelings. And if we expect our feelings to be validated, don't you think our children deserve our validation as well? Isn't that the respectful and appropriate thing to do in a family?
So, if I haven't totally confused and offended you yet, I want to know what YOU think about all this. Do you think its better to validate your children's feelings or just GET OVER IT? And why? Are there certain circumstances that would call for one or the other? How were you raised and what has worked in your own homes with your children?? Feel free to throw out suggestions, stories, theories, threats for offending you (at me only please), opinions...I look forward to hearing your thoughts!